Dr. Marvette Lacy Ph.D., (she/her) is the founder and CEO of Qual Scholars where she helps higher education folks finish their dissertations and start a profitable consulting business.
People-pleasing most likely is a big part of your secret to success as a high achiever.
A high achiever is someone who works hard, wins all the awards, and is the go-to person when you want something to be done right.
Lately, you haven’t been feeling much like a high achiever.
Any of these sound like you:
What do these things have to do with people-pleasing though?
These are the consequences of people-pleasing.
I often say that people-pleasers are unintentional liars and manipulators.
You lie about your feelings and thoughts because you think it will give a more favorable response, which is manipulation.
You most likely learned these strategies as a child and it was out of necessity and survival.
This is something I go deeper into with my clients but for now, just know that it makes sense that you are experiencing these symptoms and there is a way to change them if you’re able and willing.
For now, I just want you to consider that life doesn’t have to be this way.